


Dystopia

by hazellepotter



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Divergence - Post-Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Comfort, Engagement, F/M, Forgiveness, Heartbreak, Implied Sexual Content, Insecurity, Makeup Sex, Marriage Proposal, Shame, True Love, argument, fight, pureblood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-02-04 09:07:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18601417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazellepotter/pseuds/hazellepotter
Summary: It would be the biggest mistake of her life if she didn't fix it. Her life was not a Muggle dystopia; it was her own.





	Dystopia

All Astoria could hear was Ron's heavy breathing and the hammering of her heart in her chest. Her world around her was up in flames, and she was the reason why. She had created her own dystopia, and there was no one else to blame. She had her reasons. The words her parents spoke about them had sliced through Astoria's heart like a hot knife; she was burned. She was so burned that she knew she could not bring Ron down with her. But he didn't seem to understand, not when all he did his whole life was fight to be heard. To be the hero of the story, and to put out the flames.

"I don't care what they said!" Ron yelled, "It doesn't mean shit!" 

She had never seen him this angry, but she couldn't blame him. She knew if she were him, she would be too. 

"I-I can't let you ruin your life for me because of what they said," she reasoned, "This just wouldn't work. It was a nice fantasy but-"

Ron punched the wall, and Astoria heard his knuckles crack. He seemed to ignore the pain as he ran his other hand through his hair. 

"I won't allow them to do this to us. I have been fighting against this pureblood bullshit my entire life."

"They don't care," she explained, "My parents.. they still believe in the old ways."

"But you don't! Why don't you fight back?"

She took a deep breath, "I'm not as brave as you Ron, you know that."

_"Bullshit."_

He took the seat across from her and put his head in his hands. She watched as he tried to compose himself. 

"Astoria, you're one of the bravest people I know. You have fought against your family's customs your whole life, why does it make a difference now? Do you-"

His voice faltered, and he avoided looking in her direction. He stood up again and muttered under his breath, _"I see."_

"What?" She asked.

"You- _you don't love me,_ " he whispered, more to himself than her, "That's why it isn't worth the fight."

Astoria's breath quickened, "Ron! That's not it," she protested, "You must know that."

"Then why not fight for me?" His voice broke, and she watched as tears filled up in his eyes.

Astoria stood up and made her way towards him, but he pulled away from her attempt to comfort him.

 _"Don't,"_ he snapped, "I can't deal with pity. Not from you."

"I'm not pitying you, I'm trying to show you that I _love_ you."

"If you really loved me, then none of this would even matter."

She opened her mouth to speak, but before she could say a word, he apparated on the spot. 

* * *

Two weeks had gone by since that night, and Astoria had barely slept since. She had always dealt with insomnia, but this was different. She realized she had no way of falling asleep until Ron was back in her arms. She needed to hear his quiet snores in her ear and feel the way his legs would wrap around her's in the middle of the night. She needed him to ground her, and she knew he was right all along. It wasn't up to her family if she married him or not. It was up to _her._ She always talked about creating her own future; Ron had given her the chance, and she had turned it down after overthinking and ridiculous contemplation. It would be the biggest mistake of her life if she didn't fix it. Her life was not a Muggle dystopia; _it was her own._

She mustered up the courage Ron claimed she had and apparated to his flat that he shared with George above the joke shop. She knew George was out of town with Hermione for the month, so she could still catch Ron while he was alone. She hoped he was home, and if he wasn't, she would wait. He was worth it. He was worth _everything._

She knocked on his front door and clasped her hands behind her back. She twiddled her thumbs like she always did when she was nervous. Her breath caught in her throat when she heard his footsteps come toward the door.

Astoria read the expression on Ron's face as the door opened; she watched as he contemplated slamming it in her face, but he didn't. Instead, he took a side-step and offered for her to come in silently. She took up his offer and made her way over to his couch. He sat down next to her, but he avoided looking her in the eye.

"So, is this your final goodbye?" He asked her sarcastically, "Or are you here to rub it in a little more that I am unlovable and that it makes sense that my best friend would leave me for my _brother_ rather than marry me?"

She ignored the jab and knew he was just upset. Ron had been over Hermione for years, but the rejection still hurt him. He had felt rejected his whole life; Astoria was familiar with that feeling, until she met Ron.

"I need you to forgive me," she told him quietly, "I was wrong."

She watched as shock spread across his face and he looked up into her eyes, but it was quickly replaced with anger once again.

"You- _you_ just want me to forgive you?" He spat, "After- _after_ all that you said and reasoned? Astoria, life doesn't work that way. I can't just pick up the broken pieces and glue them back together. It takes _time_."

"I-I know," Astoria fumbled, she felt like she was going to cry, "But I do love you, Ron, and I never should have let what my parent's said impact our engagement. When you proposed.. I-I was the happiest I had ever been. I ruined that. I understand. I ruin everything I touch. _I always have."_

He surprised her by taking her hands, _"Stori-"_

But she didn't let him finish, because when she looked into his eyes, she knew his anger was quickly dissolved and she was forgiven. He understood her; he understood her in a way most people didn't. They were used to being second-rate, but not in each other's eyes; they were always first. There was no need to be afraid or insecure. _So she kissed him_ ; she kissed him like it was the first time. Taken aback, he moaned, and before she knew it, she was straddling his hips as he unbuttoned her blouse.

"Is make-up sex really going to be a thing right now?" Ron joked. He was breathless, but she watched as his pupils dilated when her top fell off her shoulders. 

"I guess so," she replied, "Because I honestly don't have the words to show you how sorry I am, or how much I love you."

A relieved smile spread across his face as she leaned down and kissed him. His hands cupped her cheeks gently, and once again, Astoria felt whole. Ron was always the hero in her story. And as he picked her up to carry her into his bedroom he asked, "So does that mean we are saying 'fuck the world' and we are getting married?"

Astoria couldn't help but laugh; it had been that easy. She was forgiven, and deep down, she knew she would be for her ridiculous fears. 

"Only on two conditions," she told him.

_"Anything."_

"We don't invite my parents and I get to wear a dress that is _not_ white. I hate that tradition. As you know, I hate _most_ traditions."

His smile was beaming as he replied, "Anything for you." 


End file.
